november

 

It is really November already... Time goes so fast, and it feels like I don't get anything done.

Everywhere I can see that Christmas is coming pretty fast. I can see lights, different ornaments and stuff. Even all magazines are full of Christmas. I don't say, that I don't like that "party". It's just... Itself makes people crazy. I like Christmas, but it's somehow suffocating. It's really bursting from people's ears.

I would like to try something different this year. But 'cause I live in home, I quess I maybe need to do that what people are expecting for me. Maybe partying in home, with dad or mom. Or in countryside with grandparents. I really would like to spend the vacation at Lapland or something. Or in Asia or anything different! Or just in home, but with some new stuff and things.

And I really hope that Christmast will be white. It has to be white, or it's getting very bad 'sphere...

Other thing I have been thinking, it's school. I bought Deko magazine today and read it. I really love interior things and stuff, and I have always been interested about it. Last fall I started a school where my line was "design and modeling". I was only technical school (second state after Finnish junior high school), so it wasn't anything very brilliant. But I quit there, dunno really why. One reason was that I had a depression. After that I went to other line, audiovisual communications (camera, tv, computer and stuff) but either that wasn't right place. Now I'm learning to hairdesigner. And I don't like it, but it takes only 11 months so I get it done. But after that... I have been thinking it really. I'm really not a hairdesigner or cutter... I wanna do more creative things. Draw, design maybe. Interior is really close to my heart, it's one of my passions. I regret that I stopt the first school... It really would have been the right thing to me. But... I don't wanna hear any moan from parents... So I don't know. And I'm pretty shy to try new things with art. Tattooer would be one of my dreams too. And writer, singer, painter, guitarist, interior designer... I really love all kind of arts, but don't know where to go. I'm really scared that I waste my time before I find the way to go. Even I know that all time is precious, even wasted...

If somebody wants to help, go ahead!

( I really apologize if my english is very bad. And the pictures are all again from weheartit.com)